Summary
On July 20, 2025,Disney’s Splash Mountain log flume set off for the last time. It was one of the most iconic theme park rides in the world, having been operational since the summer of 1989. In that time, it has witnessed dozens, maybe even hundreds of changes to theDisneytheme parks it was once the starring attraction of, but time comes for us all. The reason it was shut down? Because it was racist. And in the worm-addled brains of today’s culture war warriors, that means its replacement is woke, and this is the sole reason for its early teething problems.
Splash Mountain is not just an iconic ride. As someone who rode it once several years ago, it was also a great ride, and a quintessential example of what a log flume ride should be. However, it was based on the 1946 movie Song of the South, which is all about former slaves who liked being slaves and continue to work the plantation. That kind of logic might fly inHarry Potter, but in the real world, we tend to think that’s a bad thing to say. In order to keep the basic water theme but take away the connection to slavery from a children’s theme park ride,it has been replaced by Tiana’s Bayou Adventure, based on The Princess and the Frog, which officially opened earlier this week.
Splash Mountain No Longer Has A Place At Disney
It’s important to note that defenders of Splash Mountain point to the fact that no slaves are featured in the ride, nor are any explicitly racist caricatures. In the movie Song of the South, an elderly plantation worker tells the plantation owner’s grandson about the adventures of three animals (Br’er Rabbit, Br’er Fox, and Br’er Bear) who themselves are the stars of the ride. But Disney does not sell any physical media of Song of the South, nor is it available on Disney Plus, and has been keen to erase it from history. It stands to reason that it should not be the crown jewel of its theme park arm.
No kid grew up with this movie. They don’t know the characters or even what a ‘br’er’ is (it’s means brother). Take away all of the noise and ask yourself, is it better to have a whole chunk of the park dedicated to a Disney Princess, the most popular roster of characters the world’s biggest media company has, or an area dedicated to a movie that is impossible to watch because the studio hates it so much?
Replacing it with a Tiana ride is a bold move. She is the only Black Princess Disney has, and that turns Splash Mountain from an embarrassing reminder of Disney’s past discriminatory attitudes into one that symbolises progress. Many will point toDisney’s mixed messaging on queer charactersandthe fact it is a billion dollar conglomerateto ask how progressive the House of Mouse really is, but undeniably replacing the ride about slaves with the ride about a Black Princess doubles down on the inclusivity this move is designed to represent.
Enter the culture war. Splash Mountain is a very popular ride, and many will be sad to see it go. Last time I was at Disney, the Bayou area was still being built, and it did feel like there was a hole in the park. Some of these people are mad that a thing they like has been taken away from them and are sticking their fingers in their ears at any legitimate counterpoints. But many others have been drawn to the carnage as they always are, lured in by the scent of the grift.
Safety Standards Are Not Woke
It’s a one-two punch for wokeness. Not only is a ride being taken away in the name of inclusivity, but the replacement is a Black woman. That makes it the enemy. After its first week of operations saw some stoppages for safety precautions, everyone’s least favourite outrage peddlers have jumped on this as an example of go woke, go broke.
Former games developer Mark Kernblamed “DEI” (diversity, equality, inclusion) for these safety stoppages. I’m not sure how this makes any sense at all. Tiana may be Black but we have no idea of the background of the engineers who designed the ride. Maybe the argument is that the nuts and bolts would magically safen up if this was a Cinderella ride? Most of the mechanical parts of the ride itself are the same as they were, it’s the surrounding area with photo spots, stores, and restaurants, plus the animatronics in the ride, that have changed.
These stoppages are normal, as many park workers have pointed out to Kern and others. The Cars ride, Radiator Springs, is the most technically impressive ride at the park, simulating a real race between two different carts that cross each other without crashing. However, it is prone to a lot of stoppages, because the more advanced a ride is, the more it can go wrong. WhenGuardians of the Galaxy’sdrop tower opened in 2019, it had similar teething problems in its first month. And speaking from personal experience, in the last year I have been to three theme parks (Universal, Disney, and most glamorously, Blackpool), and all three times one ride has had to stop and reset while I’ve been riding it. I’m not the problem (I hope), it’s just that these rides have a very high safety bar and thus they will stop you if they need to.
When that happens with a new ride, especially one under the microscope, it becomes a much bigger deal. But it shouldn’t. Yes, it may stop more than the average ride but that’s because it is brand new and thus staff and customers don’t fully know what to expect. Safety comes first, not worrying about what YouTube commentariats think. Tiana’s Bayou Adventure is an exciting development for Disney World, and finally makes that area of the park something to be proud of.
Update 9:56AM UK:Some minor details regarding Song of the South’s have been corrected.
